Throwback Thursday: 7th Grade Greek Mythology Monologue

So, I’m starting a new thing here. I want to show the evolution of my writing, and to do that, you need to see old examples. So every Thusday (because #throwbackthrusday is a thing) I’m going to post either an old school assignment (that’s already been graded and whatever, they might be from this month or 4 years ago whatever I think looks interesting), or a piece of writing. I’m not going to post any of my books and stuff I’m writing because I would like to have them published one day but… I hope you guys like this.

This is basically a monologue we were required to write, memorize, dress up for, and perform in seventh grade English. We were doing a greek Mythology unit and each person was assigned a different god or goddess based on personality traits.

I got Athena.

So, here’s my 4-year-old monologue.

Greek Mythology Monologue: Athena

I am Athena, or perhaps Minerva if you are Roman. I am the goddess of wisdom, weaving, and war strategy. I was born from Zeus’ skull, split by an axe by my (step-)brother Hephaestus. Did I mention the fact that I’m my father’s favorite child? Of course I am, I am the wisest. And unlike my brother Ares, I win the battles I fight in. On the topic of family, you may have heard of my uncle Poseidon. Well, he had the nerve to sleep with my priestess in my temple. You’d know her as Medusa; of course I had to curse her. I gave her snakes hair and if any mortal man looked her in the eyes, they’d turn to stone. I later helped my half-brother Perseus behead her, but that’s a story for another day. Then, and this is ridicules, Poseidon competed with me to be the patron of Athens. I mean really, a salt-water spring versus the olive-tree, the choice was obvious, he didn’t stand a chance. I mean you’d think after helping a guy create the chariot, which was totally my idea, he’d realize you were always going to beat him, but no. I truly think that Cronus’ stomach acid rotted his brain on some level, if you’d met him, you’d believe me. You ever hear of a little thing called the Trojan War? Well, the sparks notes version is this: Paris was bribed by Aphrodite to name her the fairest out of Hera, herself and I. She promised him the hand of the most beautiful mortal women in the world, which was Helen, a princess of Sparta. The fact that I am the patron of Sparta has nothing to do with it, no matter what anyone says. And yes, one of the bloodiest wars in history was fought over a girl. Now ever heard of those nasty little things called spiders? Those, now those are my fault. You see, Arachne was a weaving student of mine, who boosted of having greater skill then myself. Now, in a weaving contest against me, her work was flawless, but it depicted scenes of horrible sins of the gods, I had no choice but to curse her. To change her into a spider. Now, on the topic of dreadful history, you all know how some mortals call me Pallas Athena? Because my best friend, a daughter of Triton, was named Pallas, and in training, I killed her in a horrible accident as a child, and took her name for myself as a tribute to her. My protective shield, Aegis is made from her skin. Another symbol of mine is the owl, really why do you think they call it wise? Now, I grow weary of speaking to mortals who haven’t a hope of remembering any of this. Good day. May the gods not smite you.

Very awkward seventh grade pictures from this assignment were we had to dress up for the monologue.